Carolyn Nuckolls

Survivor

I had just married in 2018 and was looking forward to a life with my family and husband. I have two boys from a previous relationship but we unfortunately lost their father in a car accident 5 years prior. In 2019 at age 31, I was diagnosed with HER 2 +, pr/er -. Our life was derailed. I went through aggressive chemo treatment having to leave my job. Excessive Dr. appointments on top of managing care and routine for my two boys, my oldest having ASD. I was lost and lived in constant fear. I literally broke, feeling completely defeated. I was so sick, things that are so embarrassing my dignity was stripped. I cant tell you how I made it, how I’m here, how it’s taken me a lot of soul searching to mentally get my mind out of that dark place. Jesus and my motivation to live for my children was my strength. I held onto that! A year later after chemo, DM surgery and reconstruction I conceived naturally. This was me and my husband’s first child. She was born in May and the Dr appointments for me and her were overwhelming during the entire pregnancy but by the grace of faith she is a beautiful, healthy, happy baby. I can’t tell you how unbelievable it feels to see everything that I’ve prayed to GOD for right before me. I never gave up, even when I felt like I wasn’t going to make it another minute. When I felt like my life was over I was proven wrong with another day of life. It’s okay to feel the way you want to feel. It’s okay to not put a smile on your face for everyone else, everyday. As long as you don’t stay there, in misery. Positivity is SO important to your healing during and after diagnoses. Remission is just as hard. Live with no regrets. Cancer is not all that we are about. It does not define who we are.